Come the revolution, we'll cap bankers' bonuses
Stephen William 'Billy' Bragg, senior figure in Leftie Luvvie circles, has threatened to stop paying taxes, and - revolution, Brothers! - called on others to follow suit, unless the government acts to limit bonuses paid by the Royal Bank of Scotland.
Of course, as you would expect, there's the fucking inevitable Facebook campaign, where Bragg whines..
"I understand that the Treasury had little choice but to use taxpayers' money to safeguard savings and stabilise and restore confidence in the financial system"
Oh, you 'understand' that, do you, Billy? It sounds more like you were fed that line by one of Gordon's little spin doctors.
'To safeguard savings and .. restore confidence': not exactly revolutionary talk, is it? Oh, and you forgot to mention 'hard working families': mind you, Gordo's handwriting is a bit flaky; perhaps you couldn't read that bit.
Bragg bleats on:
"What I don't understand is why, now that we taxpayers are the majority shareholders of these banks, we seem totally powerless to curb their excessive bonus culture?"
Well, Billy mate, without wishing to explain the whole of capitalism to you, it's usually the case that the shareholders want the companies they own to succeed.
One way to do this is to ensure that they have motivated staff, who are compensated at normal industry levels, do you see?
And generally, Bill, something shareholders - at least, those in their right minds, and without an overriding political agenda - would not normally do is to damage the company they have a stake in by pissing off key staff with some mindless political stunt to please blinkered lefties like you.
If you really want to drag politics into every aspect of a company's operations, and run it so it makes massive, crushing losses but ticks all of your Socialist Utopia boxes, then you have to nationalize it. And, thank Christ, even the Labour party aren't that stupid.
"I have written to the Chancellor of the Exchequer .. Alistair Darling, to inform him that I am no longer prepared to fund the excessive bonuses of RBS investment bankers.
You're not funding them, you fucking idiot. This isn't like your beloved public sector, where our money is directly funneled into the pockets of the employees.
"Unless he acts to limit them to 25,000 pounds, I shall be withholding my tax payment on 31st January."
Hang on. What? Why 25,000 pounds? Surely you're against bonuses in principle? Why is 25 OK, and, say, 30 not? You're just making this shit up as you fucking go along, aren't you?
Stick to the nasal dirges, Billy: you're good at those.
++UPDATE++: The Daily Mash, as ever, has nailed it:
"A spokesman for the Inland Revenue said: "I've actually got a copy of Talking With the Taxman About Poetry. Maybe he should do a new album called Talking With the Taxman About Spending 18 Months in Jail for Being a Marxist Twat.".
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