The eldest Furiousette received her GCSE results yesterday, and a damn fine set of results they were too. Thanks to those who wished her luck.

GCSE results were all over the media yesterday, and naturally, as Schools Secretary, the loathsome Ed Balls had something to say on the subject.

Equally naturally, as a dedicated member of the Labour Party, Balls had pretty much fuck all to say about his own policies and plans. Oh no. Nothing like that: all Government statements must be attacks on the Tories.

The public apparently doesn't need to hear about what has actually happened under this fucking inept and deceitful government - we need to hear a lot of spin and lies on what 'might' happen if we were to chuck them out and let someone else have a go.

This was Ed's little gem :

"Instead of breaking down the damaging old divide between 'excellent' academic qualifications for some and 'second class' for everybody else, the Tories seem determined to turn back the clock."

Eh? What the fuck? While trying to misrepresent those evil Tories, Blinky Balls has just inadvertently revealed some of his own bizarre socialist thinking.

So that's what Labour have been trying to do: to break down the damaging divide between those who get excellent qualifications and those who don't. To make sure everybody, regardless of skill, ability and effort, gets the 'excellent' qualifications to which they are surely entitled.

That explains everything. Of course exams have to get easier and easier. Naturally, more multiple choice papers must be introduced. Of course there must be more coursework that can be done for 'the kids' by grown-ups.

It's obvious: unless we make these exams a damn sight easier, more 'accessible', how on earth will the lazy and the not-that-bright get 'excellent' qualifications? And if they don't, well, that's not fair is it? That's not the Socialist way.

For fuck's sake.


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Just read Tory MP Greg Hands' account on Conservative Home of a visit to a school in his constituency by the dishonest duo, Gordon Brown and Ed 'Blinky' Balls, earlier this week.

Even allowing for the fact that - as a Tory MP - Hands is doubtless exaggerating and spinning the tale, it makes astonishing reading. He points out that:

"With my constituency being the closest marginal to Westminster, we are used to a few ministerial and shadow ministerial visits over the last ten years"

No doubt - its probably hard to move for gurning opportunists on the average Monday morning.


It is a documented Commons 'Convention and Courtesy' that MP's - of any party - are notified prior to a visit by Cabinet Ministers to what is, after all, their constituency.

Seems reasonable, eh? They were elected to the position, chosen by the people for the role; know what that means Brown? No? How about you, Mandelson?

Guess what? The convention was arrogantly ignored for political advantage. Who'd have thought? According to Hands:

"neither Brown nor Balls notified me of their visit. I found out from the Local Education Authority"

Sneaky fuckers. But wait, it was worse than that:

"When I arrived at the school 10 minutes early, waiting for me was a Ms Izzet from Ed Balls's office, who loudly announced, in front of an ITN camera crew, that I was "not invited"."

For fuck's sake. Does the arrogant bullying and deceit of this corrupt party never end? This is, after all..

".. a civil servant attempting to ban a Member of Parliament from a public facility in his own constituency.

In case there was any doubt as to Ms Izzet's party affiliation, and therefore her preferred modus operandi, she then gave a quick demonstration of traditional New Labour values:

"Realising that I wasn't moving, and in front of dozens of children eagerly awaiting the visit, Ms Izzet then tried to entice me to an office for "some refreshments". She was trying anything to get me out of the way.."

"Ms Izzet told me that I hadn't even myself visited the school, which was a lie"

A bit of 'stage management'? A blatant fucking lie? A quick smear? Oh, she's a Labour gal all right. As well as a neutral civil servant. Anyway, what the fuck has Hands' previous visits to a school in his own constituency got to do with you, you evil fucking harpy?

But this was her masters' special occasion, and she was buggered if she was going to have some nasty Tories wrecking it for them.

"Stephen Greenhalgh, Leader of the Council arrived, and Ms Izzet was remarkably and improbably even more confrontational towards him, even though the School was Council property and the Council is the Local Education Authority."

Dear god. Bear in mind, we pay this fucking woman, and she's supposed to be political neutral. What the flying fuck is she doing trying to chase away anyone who might criticise the dear leader? What is this, China?

Fortunately, both Hands and Greenhalgh eventually gained access to the school, and were then treated to what Hands described as "an hour of pure pantomime". Apparently, the woefully socially inept Brown blundered around making a complete arse of himself.

"Brown made a number of faux pas. His worst was to meet the same Italian teacher twice in 15 minutes and attempt to have the same conversation with her, forgetting he had already met her. Each time he told her he was looking forward to going to Italy next week"

Par for the course there, Gordon. No wonder your minders didn't want anyone around who might go 'off message' and actually report your ineptitude to the world.

Hands concludes:

"The school did a fantastic job under some pressure from the officials, but the overriding memory of this Prime Ministerial visit to my constituency is that Brown and Balls surround themselves with officials who might be even more hectoring and bullying than their masters."

But there's something Hands didn't know at the time. An extra facet to this sorry tale of bias and dishonesty.

So, the hilarious final twist? The ultimate turd in the punchbowl? It's this: the bullying bitch who put aside her political neutrality to ride roughshod over all convention, purely to protect her beloved Labour Party; the egregious 'Ms Izzet' who is fucking paid for by us, the taxpayers, is also .. wait for it .. a former girlfriend of Damien McBride. Clearly, he taught her well.


There really is no escape from the corruption, sleaze and deceit, is there?


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CF is hearing that the Daily Telegraph's next victims are that Golden Couple, Ed 'Blinky' Balls and Yvette 'Mrs Balls' Cooper.

Thinks that's unfair? Feeling 'disgusted'? Wish they could be left alone?

Just have a closer look at their smug, well-fed faces. Just think of them relaxing between the silky sheets that we paid for, perhaps sipping some champagne from lead-crystal glasses that were deemed essential for 'entertaining'.

Gazing out over a well-kept garden, a small team toiling on the flower beds, happy in the knowledge that the faint noise in the background is the value of 'their' investments ticking steadily upwards. Revelling in the fact that two claimants can cover all the gaps, make sure nothing is accidentally - ugh - paid for.

Now how do you fucking feel? Yeah, CF feels that way too.

About to be humiliated? Ooooooooooh. Let's hope so....


UPDATE: still nothing on these two, but the cry is going up at Guido Fawkes - "we want Balls!" . Perhaps the Daily Telegraph are saving this for the Grand Finale. Bring it on!


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