Constantly Furious was this evening pleased and flattered to receive an email from '10 Downing Street'

Really? Yes, really.

They were writing to say that they'd seen CF's signature on a petition. A petition that was started some time ago, with a very simple, straightforward, aim:

“We the undersigned petition the Prime Minister to resign.”

Can't be much clearer than that, really, can we?


As well as CF's signature, 72,233 other individuals also asked to be rid of the unelected McBroon. Far more than ever voted for him in any General Election, and a pretty clear message from the nation, eh?

So, how did Gordon respond? We - 72 thousand of us - said, 'Gordon, you really should resign' and he answered:

"The Prime Minister is completely focussed on restoring the economy, getting people back to work and improving standards in public services. As the Prime Minister has consistently said, he is determined to build a stronger, fairer, better Britain for all."

So, reading between the lines, do you think he's taken the criticism on board and is about to step aside?

Is he fuck. We're stuck with the bastard.


__

Jubiliation today as it is trumpeted that yet another troughing MP has got his just desserts. Yes,  David Wilshire, who managed to suck 100,000 of our cash into a company he owns has announced he will be stepping down. CallMeDave Cameron puts on his one of his 'quite cross' faces and says yes, he's "Done the Right Thing."

Huzzah! That'll teach the bastard. Let's see how he survives without ... what ? ... hang on ...oh...

So, yes, Wilshire has announced that he will be 'stepping down'. In the whole new universe of weasel words, invented for the expenses scandal, this actually means .. fuck all. The bastard's life hasn't changed at all.

He's still an MP. He's still being paid his salary. He'll still be entitled, god help us, to claim expenses. And, unless there's a massive break with recent tradition, that 100,000 will probably remain stashed wherever it is, in Switzerland, or the Cayman Islands. Pay it back? Not for me, thanks.

All Wilshire has said is that he's won't be brave enough, come the General Election, to see if his constituents would forgive his massive crime, and re-elect him. Big fucking deal. Of course they wouldn't. So now he's got six months to look for another fucking job, whilst being paid by us to not do his current one.

And he's not the only one. Look, there's:

Shahid fucking Malik, the Muslim who claimed that the "expenses Green Book is my bible" , who left the cabinet after we discovered we'd bought him a flat screen TC and a big comfy chair to watch it from, but is still a fucking MP.

Hazel bloody Blears, who defrauded the tax man as well as the taxpayer, might have left the cabinet, but is still very much alive and troughing. She didn't get deselected, so she's still on our payroll.

Elliot bastard Morley, who as well as looking like a pig, troughed like a one, claiming payments for a non-existant mortgage. Yup. Still an MP. Not for much longer, but still taking our money right now.

Barbara fucking Follet, who - in spite of her husband boasting how much money he gave her - still spent thousands of our money on making her vast house more secure. If her husband's so fuicking rich, why didn't she call it a day back in May, eh?

And then there's the Queen of all our Hearts, Jacqui 'Jackboots' Smith. She hasn't even gone as far as that. She's defrauded the taxpayer for another 100,000, and she's not paying any of it back, and she's not even announced any 'plans to step down', let alone resign, for fucks sake. In fact, its pretty fucking likely that the next time we see her stupid gurning face, she'll be wrapped in ermine, and be a proper lady. No chance of seeing the back of her.

For fucks' sake. What does an MP have to do to lose their job? How big a fraud do they have to commit to get the police involved? How preposterous does their claim have to be before they are made to pay it back?

How the fuck are we supposed to get rid of these dishonest MP's?

As CF's granny used to say, it's like trying to get shit off a blanket.


_

Be afraid, Gordon Brown.

The country's been against you for a long time, but you could completely fucking ignore us.

The opposition have been against you for ever, but you could refuse to answer their questions, and spin blatant fucking lies about their alternatives.

But now, even your own party, your previously mindlessly loyal backbenchers and cabinet colleagues are sick of you.

Like everybody else, they don't want Gordon Brown to be Prime Minister anymore.

Even now, tens of Labour MP's are sitting staring at this email, wondering if they should click the 'Send' button and consign you to oblivion.

Hope they do - it's long overdue.

There goes Hazel Blears!! The littlest Cabinet minister has finally done the right thing, and fallen on her toothpick.

And so the meltdown rages on unabated. Such entertainment.

Yet another incompetent fucking trougher decides to take the exit, kicking the snivelling, recumbent form of the PM as they push past him.

CF wonders if the wimmin all plotted this together, sitting up late on Sunday night, planning this out, chuckling as they imagined the sound of Nokias striking plaster.

Surely CF is right, and Its all over for Gordon now. He's got no friends, no supporters and - hopefully - no fucking future.

Gordon, for fuck's sake take the hint : make sure you're next.



(hat tip Gigits for the pic)

Gordon "prime mentalist","snot gobbler", "McDoom" Brown's top secret checklist for the destruction of this once great nation must be pretty well completed now

• Economy fucked : tick
• Loss of control; Cabinet Ministers walking out without even bothering to tell him : tick
  
• Unemployment soaring : tick
• Loss of control; Cabinet Ministers who've broken the law staying firmly in place : tick
  
• MP's almost universally loathed and distrusted : tick
• Loss of control: Cabinet Minister's who've openly dissed him remain in Cabinet : tick
  
• Labour Lords suspended for the first time in centuries : tick

What a fucking brilliant CV to take to his next job; "So Mr Brown, tell us a bit more about your achievements in your last role"

But if course, it wasn't his fucking fault. No, no; some of it started in America, some of it was Maggie and the evil Tories' fault, and a lot of the rest was done by a big boy who then ran away.

And now we have to hear how he's appalled by what's gone on - how his Presbyterian conscience won't stand for it. Give us a fucking break, you idiot.

Cranmer puts it eloquently:

".. it is a curious Presbyterian conscience which tolerates a decade of ‘spin’ and deception, is content to squander trillions of pounds and reduce the nation to penury, but then decide to be pricked by the blasphemous idolatry and intolerable excesses of duck islands, moat cleaning and a bit of second-home flipping"

The condemnation is near-universal. No-one wants the bastard anymore. Over 50 Labour MP's have begged to be shunted into the House of Lords, so they can carry on in politics (and/or carry on troughing) away from the one-eyed son of the manse.

The ever-loyal Guardian recommends that its readers break with the habit of a life time and vote for one of the Lib-Dems, one of our better known minority parties. A minority party that leads Labour in some recent polls, for fuck's sake.

And yet, our unelected Prime Minister is clearly fucking deaf as well as nearly blind. He doesn't hear the criticism, he doesn't listen to the advice, and he keeps plodding on, head down, oblivious to the cabbages and excrement being rained down on him from all quarters.

Surely, surely, there's only one way this hideous soap opera can end.

Gordon is not going to go voluntarily, so he has got to be dragged away, in cuffs if necessary, and put somewhere nice and secure, where he can no longer hurt himself or others. Come along, it's for your own good, dearie.

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At last, at fucking last.

The good people of Redditch have been busily campaigning against the 'Second Home Secretary' ever since her egregious troughing habits became a tasty starter for the fucking banquet of expenses revelations we've had to endure for what seems like the entire decade.

There was a vast amount fury vented against her for the preposterous Damian Green arrest about which she, although fucking responsible for the police, apparently knew fucking nothing. Or if she did know something, she certain did nothing. Or if she did do something, she certainly said nothing about it. Fairly standard form, sadly.

Nobody was particularly suprised when it was announced that even her husband couldn't bear the thought of her, and had started an affair with a box of Kleenex. Although we were fucking livid to find that he was charging us for the porn he needed to awake his Honourable Member, after years of waking up next to the other Honourable Member.

But it looked like all of this was going to be conveniently forgotten, as the nation gathered around its televisions and PC's, united in the desire to forget about all that massive ineptitude and horrendous dishonesty and focus instead on somebody who'd bought an ickle house for his fucking ducks. That's what we need to stamp out, sheeple.

Clearly Ms Smith is a little smarter than she looks, and has decided to jump the sinking ship. Actually, this particular ship is not only sinking but on fire; filled with rabid HIV-positive baboons; under attack from albatrosses with Ebola and drug-crazed Somalian pirates with AK47's whilst being sailed towards the rocks at full speed, during a hurricane, by Stevie Wonder. No wonder she wants to get off.

In typical Labour couldn't-spin-a-child's-windmill fashion, the announcement has come out in ten different ways through ten different channels, and nobody's real sure what the fuck is going on. But it looks like, by next week, Ms Smith with be back behind a trestle table, ladling luke warm 'mystery meat' stew into plastic bowls at a Redditch Comprehensive.

Unless, of course, she means only to resign from Cabinet, but to remain as an MP? Surely fucking not? Surely even she realises that she's got to go properly, completely, not just back a few feet to a lesser bench? Her majority in Redditch is so slim that she's only delaying the inevitable. Give it up altogether, love. Get out of politics. There's Chocolate Crunch for pudding, and that custard won't serve itself.

Hopefully this is just the first stone, the one that represents the beginning of an absolutely fucking enormous avalanche of MP's disappearing from the Cabinet, from the backbenches and from our lives.

Rejoice, just rejoice.

Speaking earlier today, Gordon Brown said .. well, he said fuck all, because after a brief tour of television studios' sofas, he's crawled back under his bed, where he's curled up, sucking his thumb and whimpering.

Come on Gordon, out you come: you're next.

.