Constantly Furious: speak english you lazy foreigner

Abdulahi Mohammed applied for a council house in Birmingham. His application was successful, and the council wrote to him offering accommodation.

Mr Mohammed was not pleased, however. The letter was - gosh - in English, and he doesn't speak English. Oh no.

So, having been received a letter from an English person working for an English City council to a person living in England about council accommodation in England, Mr Mohammed claimed he "could not understand" it.

So what did he do? Well, of course he fucking did: he took the council to court. For sending him a letter in English. For fuck's sake.

He argued that officials acted "in breach of the Housing Act" by not informing him that he would be removed from the waiting list if he rejected the offer. Dear God.

Well, presumably he didn't argue that at all, not speaking any English. His argument was probably some sort of foreign-talk nonsense, in whatever overseas jibber-jab he wanted all his future correspondence to be. But we digress.

To Mr M's dismay Birmingham County Court found in favour of the Council.

So what did he do then? Of course he fucking did: he took the case to the Court of Appeal. The highest Court in the Land.

We all know how this story ends, don't we?

Well, no, for once we don't. This one ends differently.

Lord Justice May, in an unexpected burst of common sense, decided that Mr Mohammed had been “properly informed” by the council as set out in the 1996 Housing Act. He ruled that, while a local authority was required to make sure letters it sent were understandable, it did not have a duty to make sure recipients could speak English.

The Court of Appeal ruled that the council was not required to make sure that its communications could actually be understood by recipients. Well, hoo-fucking-ray. At last. Some sense.

A council spokeswoman said:

“We are pleased with the Court of Appeal’s ruling, which acknowledged that Birmingham City Council made available adequate translating services for Mr Mohammed. This is an important point of law for all local authorities in England.”

Whereas what she said when the microphones were switched off was