Expenses: Hattersley's Spitting Mad

Roy Hattersley, former MP, former Chancellor and former Home Secretary, has been sharing with us his opinions on the MP's expenses debacle.

And guess what? Guess what he thinks? He doesn't agree with Sir Christopher Kelly's findings, or with the new rules. Who'da thought, eh?

Roy, the man famously - and accurately - described by Tony Blair as that "Yorkshire Cunt", feels that the new rules and payback orders are

"..the price that the honest and hard-working majority have to pay for the excesses of their colleagues who exploited the system in a way which was part scandal and part farce"

Boo-fucking-hoo, Fattersley. Honest and hard working majority? Only about 3 fucking MP's came out of this with any dignity, and even Broon himself had to give back twelve grand.

If we're to believe partisan old Roy, it was pretty much only the terrible Tories that abused the system. He manages to mention Derek Conway, he reminds us about Douglas Hogg's moat, he can't resist talking about the 'Duck House' and even tries a quick smear on CallMeDave and the £237 he had to pay back.

But Roy, Roy, you missed a couple.

What about 'Justice' Minister, Shahid Malik, who bought an enormous flat screen TV? What about Elliot Morely, who claimed for a payments on a nonexistent mortage? What about, for Christ's sake, Jacqui fucking Smith, self-confessed "Poster Girl" for the whole tawdry scandal? Didn't you hear about any of those, Roy?

One of the issues Lardy Chatterley has with all this nasty transparency and openness is that

"..in the short term the result can only be an increase in the conviction that politicians cannot be trusted and that draconian regulation is the only way to keep them honest"

Well, fuck, yes. We've already got that 'conviction'. Unlike Hazel Blears, Jacqui Smith et al, who should have fucking criminal convictions. Politicians cannot be trusted? Yup. We need to be keep them honest? Yeah.

Roysie goes on to condescendingly warn us that we should avoid

"..the pretence that all the new proposals are either right or reasonable. They are a response to the populist clamour that the exposure of previous excesses .. created"

Populist clamour? What the fuck? Is that a patronising way of saying 'what the people want', Roy? Is it? Are you suggesting we should protect those poor, poor MP's from our unreasonable demands? Bollocks.

Remember, all you MP's, we elected you, and you work for us. Don't listen to old Uncle Roy, he's pissed again.

You'll fucking do what we want.

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