Nanny is now everywhere, telling us how to behave, and what we should think. She keeps her beady eye on us too: we're the officially the world's number one nation for CCTV. Thanks for that, Labour.
But other countries across the world are making an effort to keep up with us. Australia has performed particularly well in this race, and may even be edging ahead with their latest initiative.
Yes, it's yet another sad day for our liberties when we learn that Australian customs officers have been given new powers to search incoming travellers' laptops and mobile phones for pornography. What the fuck? Yup, it's real:
"..a new question appears on Incoming Passenger Cards asking people if they are carrying "pornography".
And if you should tell a naughty fib? Won't help. Customs officials now have..
".. an unfettered right to examine travellers' electronic devices"
Oh, so they get unfettered rights, to trample all over ours? Dear God.
What next? What happens if, during the flight to Sydney, CF dozes off and has a particularly fruity dream involving Gemma Arterton, that ginger bird off of Doctor Who and a bottle of baby oil.? Will he have to confess all to the customs officer? For fucks' sake.
Under the last, all-too-recent, thank-Christ-it's-over, authoritarian Labour government, we could have glumly expected exactly the same legislation to be enacted here. It's already happened on the Eurostar, many years ago, so it wouldn't be hard to extend to the airports. Perhaps the show-em-nude, todger-detecting x-ray scannners could be upgraded to read hard discs as well?
Let's hope the Coalition boys are all too busy...