Global Warming? More bull

One of the oh-so-very-many things that the Righteous would love to deny us is a nice, juicy steak.

And not just because it's bad for us individually. No. Livestock is, like, bad for the whole planet, man.

We've been repeatedly told, by endless weeping hippies and smug scientists, that cows are worse than Hummers, and sheep, the woolly bastards, are worse than coal-fired power stations.

Their noxious emissions will kill us all. In our selfish and rapacious desire for something to go with the spuds, we're filling the air with methane, and killing Gaia, dudes.

Really? No, not really. Completely unsurprisingly, it now turns out that this is all, well, bullshit.

A new study, described in a paper published in Nature has found that cattle grazed on the grasslands of China actually reduce one of the big 3 'greenhouse' gases, nitrous oxide.

Klaus Butterbach-Bahl (really?), of the Karlsruhe Institute of Technology in Germany, carried out the study in Inner Mongolia in China. He found that grassland produced more nitrous oxide when there are no sheep or cattle to keep the grass short.

Dr B-B points out that the study overturned assumptions about grazing goats and cattle.

"It's been generally assumed that if you increase livestock numbers you get a rise in emissions of nitrous oxide. This is not the case"

Yet again, we find that 'assumptions' have been made, mysteriously turned into 'facts' and then rammed down our throats by the wailing panic-mongers of the global warming brigade.

It's the grass that's the bad boy - it shelters microbes that produce the gas. And nitrous oxide emissions from temperate grasslands in places like Inner Mongolia as well as vast swatches of the United States, Canada, Russia and China are reckoned to account for up a third of the total amount of the greenhouse gas produced each year.

So - duh - we need to recruit a whole lots of grass-eating animals to eat the eevil polluting grass. And then, when they've helped us out like that, we can eat them. Double win!

So, you deluded hand-wringing hippies, you 'resting' actresses with half a brain and nothing better to do, and you greedy, grant-chasing scientists, why don't you all shut the fuck up?

CF is eating his dinner.

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