Tough on crime? No, tough on YOU

Yet another nannying group of cretins has decided that we, the public, really don't know how to behave, and we need to be taught, to make us better citizens.

'Witness Confident' is a charity (well, of course it fucking well is) dedicated to

"addressing the dilemma as to how to get people to speak up when the interests of others (rather than their own) are at stake"

Yeah, that's what we all need. No moral fibre, most of us. Selfish and self-centred. Tut, tut, tut.

One thing we're apparently a bit naughty about is helping others when they're victims of street crime. Lord knows why, when we hear a bit of shouting on the High Street, we just won't make a snap judgment and wade on in.

Perhaps we foolishly listened to the Police, who have always firmly discouraged the "have a go hero" mentality, leading as it often does to extra victims.

But Witness Confident think we damn well should be diving in, getting involved. They want to

"challenge a "walk-on-by" culture to street crime."

Because they think (and, remember, Nanny always knows best):

"individuals should take greater steps to act if they witness a crime, particularly street violence."

Do you remember the pack of fucking lies that was the Labour 1997 manifesto? "Tough on Crime and tough on the causes of Crime". What the fuck happened to that then?

Instead of being tough on the causes of crime, it appears that we need to be tough on witnesses of crime, re-educating the cowardly public so that we can all help Plod to catch the muggers, bag-snatchers and ne'er do wells that infest our streets. So they can all be given a slapped wrist or a pointless ASBO.

So guess what Witless Confident are going to do? Oh, do give up, you never will. They're going to stage 'Mock muggings' across the UK,

"to test the public's willingness to aid victims and report crimes"

Oh, for fucks' sake. Mock fucking muggings? What could possibly go wrong there?

So, WC, you're going to get a couple of not-too-bright (and heavily insured) actors to mime a little street crime are you? Just so you can 'test' us? See how brave and altruistic we are?

And when the act has concluded, and the actors are congratulating each other - "no, no, you were marvellous, luvvie, simply marvellous" - and you have revealed the trick to the admiring onlookers?

What will you do then? Call the whole High Street together for feedback? Give us marks out of 10 for heroism? And what if we did "walk on by"? What then? Will you make us stay behind after shopping and write lines? Send a note to our parents, saying that we "could do better"?

Listen, you drivelling do-gooders; we don't need to be patronised, or shown how we 'should' behave. We don't need to be tricked into examining our motives. We don't need to be made into 'better citizens'. We need to be left the fuck alone.



Anonymous said...

Lol, I saw this on the interweb somewhere.

The first thing that crossed my mind was what will the thespian luvvies do if someone decides they will have a go and give the actors a right kicking?
Would make a good "You've been framed" video!

I dunno, this "government" can't even get a consistent message out for all their army of spin doctors and "media advisors".

We're told "don't have a go", Blunkett's Bobbies are afraid of jumping in a pond to save a boys life ('elf & safety innit) and then Harperson walks round her constituency wearing a stab jacket.

Oh, but if the public witness anything they shoudl get stuck in?
Beggars belief!

Typical of this lot, always looking at the effects and doing diddly squat about the causes.

To all of the ZaNu Lab lot - this country is an amoral place thanks to your stupid social experiment.

Reminds me of a classic IT scenario...

If people don't use the system properly we should change the system (at great expense usually)

Err, no - you find out who is using it incorrectly, tell them to stop it. It really isn't that difficult!

If you haven't seen this news CF then it's worth a look - at leat it'll get your blood pressure up a bit!

Right, always a bit ranty when I read your blog, but I guess that is the point!

....and breathe.....

mungle said...

Get involved and get collared as a perpetrator. An easy collar helps meet the targets.

Anonymous said...

Leaflet campaigners are humourous, and would be funny if the country wasn't in such a shit state thanks to Liebour.

The time for action will come when the swines give us the chance to vote them out, if they will ever grow the backbone to grant us such an honour. Honestly, it's getting to the point where Labour aren't decent enough to clean the shoes of the most poorest, the corrupted scum. At this rate we will be brainwashed into being scared of the police and eating celery in our cages in a few years time.

Rob said...

Bloody fake charities...another Labour invention.

JuliaM said...

"What could possibly go wrong there?"

All kinds of things.

Lots of, I hope, very amusing things... ;)

JuliaM said...

"Bloody fake charities..."

It seems this one isn't, for a change (comments here).

At least, yet...

Mark Wadsworth said...

What JuliaM says.

patently said...

what will the thespian luvvies do if someone decides they will have a go and give the actors a right kicking?

Easy; they'll call Plod. Then, the bystander will be arrested for assault, prosecuted, and convicted.

Meanwhile, elsewhere in London, a real mugger will get away with it, there being no camera-wielding thesps to put in a call to summon the cavalry.

The 3rd Elf said...

The opening text at

It’s hard to believe that last year 80% of all street crime in this country went unreported...

Funny they should write that it is hard to believe, because if it wasn't reported, how do these lying fucks know?

Anonymous said...

Heh! Once this becomes widely known about, REAL muggings will be ignored as passers-by presume it's a mock-up...



Anonymous said...

Its like these cunt reporters who "smuggle" fake bombs onto planes only to moan like fuck when they dont get caught, then moan even fucking louder when they do and are facing prosecution. What those cunts need is for security to shot the fuckers as suspected terrorists and then say "see our system works happy now wankers "

the man who fell back to bed said...

oh yes, I'll definitely be getting stuck in the next time I see a mugging. five gets you ten the feral ratboy doing the mugging kicks the f*** out of me at best and then I get sent down for assaulting the poor dear and abusing 'me 'yooman rights, innit'.

cocksmoking do gooding f***ing saddlesniffing twatbuckets...

LION IF England said...

Sounds like a new department of common porpuse,or anouther FUCKING GOVERMENT SCAM