Eight things I hate

Constantly Furious' blog continues its meteoric ascendancy into the upper levels of the Blogosphere. First there was the rave review from Iain Dale (caution, may contain sarcasm);

Then the blog gained its very first resident comments troll, the brave and famous 'Anonymous' , who claims to be "..standing up and being counted" Huh?

And now CF has been tagged, by the inestimable Rab C Nesbit, for the "Eight things I hate" game.

Being a mild mannered and reasonable man, there's not many things that CF can be said to hate, but .. hang on .. that's bollocks .. amongst the myriad things that make CF furious are:

  1. Chicken Korma: just like a real curry, but with added milk and sugar (and no spices). So, more like chicken fucking porridge then. Why the fuck would you go to a curry house, then order that shit? If that's the only curry you can manage, bring some fucking Cow & Gate next time.

  2. 'Anonymous' comments on blogs. Especially when they're wildly aggressive or pointlessly contentious. What the fuck is the matter with you? If you think your opinion has any value, put a name by it. Make up a name, for fucks sake, if you're that worried your boss/mummy/constituency will find out. Otherwise, stop wasting our time. No-one cares what Anonymous thinks.

  3. Cyclists on the road, when there's a perfectly good, wide, smooth cycle-path, that I also paid for (along with the road you're blocking) sitting empty six fucking feet away? Do you want me to knock you off your stupid carbon fibre fucking toy? Bad enough when you cycle alone, but fucking infuriating when you choose to hold a cycle race, on the A1, on Bank Holiday weekend.

  4. Big Brother: why in the name of God have we put a bunch of mentally disturbed people, criminals and sociopaths into a pretend house together? And, even if we have, why are we sitting up all night to watch them argue about fucking pasta?

  5. That bloody blue cotton shirt, which is apparently the only bloody shirt in the wardrobe suitable for a dinner party; the collar never stays down and what the fuck is it made out of? Even outdoors, in winter, it's far too fucking hot. Can it not be replaced? Or even augmented with another? Why is it always this one?

  6. Facebook: "Which Spice Girl are you?", "Look ,it's the back of my mates head", "Which 1950's American car are you", "Join the campaign for more sunshine", "Which sexually transmitted disease are you?" Who the fuck cares?

  7. PC World: I want to buy a laptop. I know a fuck sight more about this one then you do, perhaps because you're apparently 11 years old. Why aren't you in school? I've already pointed to the one I want. Why have I got to stand here for fifteen minutes while we wait for the only fucking person in the shop authorised to go round the back to see if there are any in stock? And why, dear god why, am I now leaning over the counter, borrowing the shop's 'phone to wait in the queue on a hotline to cancel the extra fucking cover you just sold me even though I said , I SAID, I didn't fucking want it.

  8. The movie "The Royal Tenenbaums". What a fucking stupid film. CF left the cinema about 20 minutes in and went for a beer, alone, rather than watch that desperately pretentious, deeply unfunny crap. Can't even bear to watch clips from it. What a royal fucking waste of everyone's time.

Dear god, its difficult to keep the blood pressure down.

Now, part of the game is to pass the meme on. CF thinks it might be a laugh to pass it to some Lib-Dems. After all, they never get angry about anything, right there in the middle 'n' all. It'd be fun to see Lib-Dems do some hatin'. Take it away Charlotte "influential" Gore and Mark "friend of Polly" Thompson at Mark Reckons.


JamesW said...

'Chicken Korma: just like a real curry, but with added milk and sugar (and no spices)'

Go to a proper restaurant then. A Korma is unlikely to be an arse burning experience, but it should contain cinnamon, cardamon, coriander, cumin, and all the other standard Indian suspects. If you're getting served chicken in milk and sugar, then they're playing you just like our hoonarable MPs.



CALM DOWN!You are not quite there yet. Top ranting on 1 to 5, but:

1. What are doing even KNOWING about what goes on on FACEBOOK? Do you NOT recall the girl who asked Dr Johnson why an anatomical word was not in his dictionary? (you see you are attracting a rather higher level of cerebrum to your blog now, well done)

2. Only the brain dead even enter PC World. Normal people use, say, er, ebuyer

3. How did you manage to enter a cinema with the RT's on? Were you, quite unerstandly, on a shedload of antidpressants lie the rest of the thinking population? Possibly pissed in Outer Monglia? More detail PLEASE

Fidothedog said...

PC World, Jesus I hate that store.

Went in the other week to picks some odds an ends up. Ended up helping some bloke chose a printer as no fucking staff about.

Then as I am talking to this chap - doing their job - some spotty oink whos balls had not dropped tries to home in for a fucking sale.

I actually pointed out the chap could get the printer for about £30 cheaper online an he left.

Anonymous said...

Thought of taking tranquilizers, mate?

-By Anonymous-

Anonymous said...

Thanks for your marvelous
posting! I certainly enjoyed
reading it, you may be a great author.I will ensure that I bookmark your blog and may come back someday.

I want to encourage you to continue your great work, have a nice

My blog - View here
Also see my web site :: Click here