OUR money, down OUR toilets

CF is very aware that we're all beginning to run the risk of Blogging a Dead Horse, but there's not a lot else to talk about until the election is called, so here's another angle, one that made CF particularly enraged.

MP's, we now know, can claim expenses for pretty much every damn thing they fancy. As well as glittery toilet seats, Kit Kats, Aga servicing and probably trips to Alton fucking Towers, they can also claim for food.

But [put on husky voice] ..this is not just food, this is Member of Parliament food. They aren't expected to scrape by on the sort of cheap stuff we all eat, no no no. MP's can claim for up to 400 pounds per month for food. 4,800 pounds per year.

Think this doesn't sound like much? Think that's reasonable? After all, even an MP needs a 3 square meals a day, right?

Do you know what the basic pension is? The annual payment for some poor sod who's worked for nearly 50 years, paying tax, national insurance and all the hundreds of other stupid taxes that suck at the pay packet like fat leeches, eventually excreting piss-poor public services and inadequate infrastructure?

A retired person on a basic pension will receive just over 4,900 pounds per year. Not just for food, for everything. To feed their only friend, the cat; to heat their council house (if Baroness Uddin hasn't turfed them out to take up residence herself); to pay their phone bill; to send a tenner to their grandson for his birthday; to buy cardigans and humbugs; everything.

Meanwhile, among the MP's who apparently, like baby birds, need to be fed every few hours and therefore claim the full allowance, was -- of course -- John Prescott.

The same John Prescott who claimed for not one but two replacement toilets.

The same John Prescott who is a self-confessed binge-eating bulimic.

So -- you might need to sit down here -- over the last couple of years, John Prescott, whilst achieving the square root of fuck all for this country, spent as much as your Granny lives on, just for food for himself, then puked most of it down a toilet that we paid for.

You. Could. Not. Make. This. Shit. Up.



Anonymous said...

One can only hope that one day, as he vomits - he chokes!

Alan W said...

Not only that - they don't have to show receipts for food. £400 a month and no questions asked.

Anonymous said...

Is that Tracey or a pie he has got his snout in?

Anonymous said...

What are you trying to suggest ??

That I am a cookie-tosser or just a tosser ??


The End (Bye Bye!) said...

Brilliant stuff!

The bit about pensioners, sending a tenner to their grandson, made me mist up a bit.

Anonymous said...

look at all that ugly fat, riddled with lard and ozzing unhealthyness. and the pie doesn't look that good either

Anonymous said...

He is a useless lump of lard.

Anonymous said...

HEADLINE! FUCKING GREAT PIE EATEN BY FUCKING GREAT PUDDING. prescot: i can fully justify my £400 a month food bill. it is essential for all people in public life to maintain and promote a healthy diet and set a good example to the masses . the fat sponging bastard

Anonymous said...

I remember being at Waterloo Station, perhaps 10 years ago one afternoon,waiting for a train to replace my cancelled one.
As I stood by the platform entrance,I noticed that the fast train to Southampton had not yet left,even though it was two minutes behind schedule.
Then from the eastern taxi rank entrance came a blob of humanity,shuffling across the concourse as fast as his legs could carry him.
He looked at me as if he thought I was about to hit him (this was before the great egg/punch incident)and then I realised who it was.
Yes,South West Trains were holding the train for the fat shit himself,John Prescott.The minute he got on,off it trundled.
I could embellish this story by saying that he ran down the platform until he saw the Restaurant Carriage,but I expect he needed to go to the toilet to vomit up the previous lot of food we had all paid for!